Documents/Paranoia’s Box

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Description

This document details the discovery, acquisition, and research of Paranoia's Box by Urbanshade. This document can be found in the Paranoia's Box Heavy Containment room.

Document

Paranoia's Box

Paranoia's Box document. Click to enlarge image

Z-1932 - Codename: "Paranoia's Box", is a box filled with with as-of-yet unknown contents that is constantly leaking green fumes from its cracked open lid. Discovered in 2016 during a raid on a "Cult Of Noli" compound located in Rosebud Montana, being guarded fiercely by cult members. Study has shown the materials of the box to be of Soviet origin, sourced somewhere around 1932. It is currently unknown where in the Union the box originated from, as all of the followers pressed ESC and reset before they could be captured, so no interrogations could take place.

Despite where it was found, the chest and its innards seem to hold no correlation with Noli. N.O.S.T. volunteered to send an expedition for an interview, and during the interview, Noli confirmed that he had no idea what the box was or why his followers had it.

The fumes extruding from the box are not inherently dangerous, but shouldn't be inhaled nonetheless. Inhaling the gas will cause the persons inhaling it to get the following phobias: Arachnophobia, Cleithrophobia, Astrophobia, Erythrophobia, Cherophobia, Dystychiphobia, Capnophobia and Ommetaphobia. The aforementioned phobias will only manifest when brought into contact with anything listed.

For example, anyone not originally afraid of spiders will only have the fears manifest when they actually encounter one. The more gas is inhaled, the more intensive the fear reaction becomes. The phobias will slowly wear off after a few days if the inhalation of fumes stops. The containment room the box is located in is outfitted with 2 ventilation fans that are constantly sucking any fumes produced by the box into an airtight room to be disposed of. Should these fans fail, the gas would slowly spread all throughout the Blacksite, causing anyone inhaling it to get any of the effects mentioned above.

Despite numerous attempts, the box has never been opened. The ropes tied around the box seem to be impervious to damage, and are tied around it so tight that they cannot be pulled off to either side. The box itself seems to have the same effect, where it is also completely impervious to any form of damage. X-ray scans have shown nothing inside of it either. Below are the listed tools that have been used in an attempt to open the box:

  • Scissors
  • Knives
  • Wire cutters
  • Bolt cutters
  • Blowtorch
  • Crowbar
  • Drill
  • Sledgehammer
  • Jackhammer
  • Rocket sledgehammer
  • 6 C4 charges planted on each surface of the box
  • Corrosive acid
  • 1000kg bomb
  • 5000kg bomb
  • Being shot by the Heavenpiercher
  • Being stepped on by Trenchbleeder River
  • ██████ ██████

Please note that whilst the ██████ ██████ managed to scratch the paint slightly on the trim of the box, it will not be used again due to the $2.405.250 worth of damage it caused.

Trivia

  • The Cult of Noli was not willing to give up Paranoia’s box, as they believed it contained a highly powerful mind-altering drug.[1]

Citations

  1. "But the followers thought the box was like superweed" YourFriendZeal on Discord, May 2024.